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Monday 25 November 2013

"Simple pleasures are always the last refuge of the complex" ~ Oscar Wilde


Peonies and David Austin roses on my dining table. Simple and beautiful.

I'm currently holed up at my parents house. I've spent a lot of time here this year. I've enjoyed the rest and break from routine although it's hard being away from B. It gives me some time to think and nap. I usually have too much going on and 8 months of broken sleep tends to catch up to you eventually. But not only rest. I can sit guilt free and catch up on emails and reading, something I used  to take for granted. Summer is mere days away. But at least the house has had a purge and clean. 


I took advantage of Ari dropping her 3rd nap to begin planning for Christmas. Even battled David Jones and came out unscathed. 

Ari is more grown up and more amazing with each day. I want to teach her to be kind and generous. I want to spoil her with unconditional love and support and not material things. She will get a few small token gifts . Some ornaments for the tree and a new outfit as per the cultural tradition. 

Scaling back has been good. The less you have the less you can manage without. Proven true this year.

Tuesday 19 November 2013

Time


Why is time going by so fast?  Each day is faster than the one before and each new month seems to roll around too quickly.  I seem to be overcome with guilt.  It's snowballing.  Nothing is ever good enough in my head.  The past week I've been doing a lot of spring cleaning.  I tend to feel guilty if I don't spend Ari's awake time doing stimulating activities with her and then when the day draws to a close I'm overwhelmed with the sheer amount of non baby related chores that I didn't get to do.  I've spent many nights over the last week or two up way past my bed time cleaning out every corner of the house.  Throwing out books, magazines, old paperwork, DVD's... cleaning windows, getting the laundry pile to zero.  Figuring out what the dress the baby in now that I'm sick of all of her winter clothes, yet summer weather is nowhere to be seen. And email.  Oh the email.  Why is it so hard for you to stop emailing me if I've unsubscribed from your mailing list you silly website??  You're no longer relevant to me.

I have a desk drawer to clean out during tomorrow's morning nap and I think I am done for the time being.  Maybe then I work on purging myself of the copious amounts of sugar I've been eating to cope? Not maybe, definitely. This dull headache needs to go.

Friday 15 November 2013

Happy Friday!!

In true Melbourne style, we're 2 weeks away from summer,yet we've had 10 days of truly wintry weather.  I'm sick of my winter clothes and sick of Ari's winter clothes.  I miss the sunshine and I miss our afternoon trips to the park.  It's been raining and gloomy, which matches my mood.

Today we're running some errands, picking up a parcel and buying fresh bread.  We have a weekend of catch ups with friends after our swimming class tomorrow.  What are you all up to?

Country Road scarf, Glassons jacket, Forever New top, A-Store skirt, Wolford tights, Witchery flats


Wednesday 13 November 2013

Turning 30



My Ariana - the best gift of all
If you follow me on instagram and twitter (username is milijana_ on both) you would have seen that I turned 30 about two months ago.  I decided that spending it with my little girl was enough for me.  And I've spent the last 2 months thinking about it.  Who I am and who I want to be.  What have I learnt?  Well a lot.

My whole life changed with the birth of my daughter.  I discovered a love in my heart that I never knew existed.  I discovered selflessness and an urge to protect this beautiful, tiny person who depends on me.  I have changed but I'm still exactly the same. I'm stubborn and headstrong.  I'm a dreamer and a thinker and a planner and a list writer.  I still question myself all the time and I suffer from guilt.  Oh the guilt.  Mothers guilt and daughters guilt and friend guilt.  

My 20's have taught me to save a little bit.  Even $10 from the casual job that earns you $60 a week.  They have taught me to travel.  Seeing new places is the greatest thing that money can buy.  I have learnt that I don't need a lot of STUFF.  To take a chance and make the most of each opportunity that presents itself, as it may not be possible again or any time soon.  Or it may not be appropriate to my life circumstances later.  To look after my health while it's good, not to try to repair it when it's "broken".  To love those who love me.  To be kind to myself, to forgive myself.  To forget.  To not dwell on the past or the mistakes I make.  But to learn.  To continue to teach myself new things and not overthink them.  



To smile.  And be happy.  Life has a way of working itself out.

Sunday 3 November 2013

Away



Had the crazy idea to book a night away this weekend as we were attending a double birthday celebration about an hour from home so thought we could make a weekend of it. With all the stuff required for a baby whether for a night or a week away from home it quickly became a logistical nightmare. I did however enjoy the 24 hour break from domestic chores. The weather was incredible on Saturday.